10 – There’s only one way to spell Christmas; with Hanukkah you get so many choices.
9 – Nobody looks good in a reindeer sweater.
8 – Maccabees kick wise man ass.
7 – Making friends insanely jealous over eight nights of gifts. None of them – ever! – needs to know that half of those gifts are socks and underwear.
6 – No trees are harmed in the celebration of your holiday.
5 – While everyone else is still manic over shopping, you’re already in Boca enjoying the early bird with Nana.
4 – Paul McCartney’s “Wonderful Christmas.”
3 – Sour cream and applesauce taste lousy on ham.
2 – The whole Jesus vs. Santa thing: not your problem.
1 – Red with green? Please.